Q+A/ The Problem with Toenails

I must apologize for my recent absence from the blogosphere. I had a gastrointestinal illness wreak great havoc upon me this weekend. Although I felt terrible most of the time, I cannot lie that the feeling of acid eating through my intestinal lining really kept me from wanting to eat hamburgers or drink beer. I felt as if some creature was taking a fantastic journey through my digestive system, similar to how Barileau must feel when he plays with his pet gerbil but devoid of any feeling of pleasure. Anyway, I would like to get back to the regular Q&A of the blog so I will go after the following question posed my Michael Glab:
Half of one of my toenails is falling off......should I remove it myself and if so how ?

I am sorry to get to this answer after Michael may have already performed the operation on his toe, but the common treatment is to tape the broken nail down over the nail bed to prevent any further pain. The nail bed is full of nerve endings and is extremely sensitive to touch. Antibitotic ointment can be placed over the nail bed, and the broken nail may be gradually trimmed as the new nail grows beneath. There are cases where blood may be under the nail causing pressure on the nail bed and the doctor will drill a small hole to relieve pain. Also, there are certain cases where the nail falls off or is removed, and then a bandage and antibiotic ointment should be placed over the nail bed. Ibuprofen or tylenol can be taken for inflammation and pain. Also, I recommend that Mike does not give any of his sensual "foot jobs" to any female counterparts or the broken toenail may predispose to the first case of toenail gonorrhea.

In finishing, I wanted to add this one picture to the blog that I promised long ago. It signifies a simpler time at the end of our high school years when a trip to the Salvation Army was enough to entertain us for the entire weekend. This picture includes Michael Glab, Anthony Garcia, Kevin Newman, Rob Tamillow, Dan Ferri, and myself. Behold the glory and try not to be tempted by the "Attack of the Big Mac" t-shirt.